The title sounds highly inappropriate. I can assure you, it's not.
Last night as I was getting the bassinet put back together Marcus said it was all just beginning to hit him that we were about to go through the newborn stage yet again. "Oh, really," I said, "You're just now beginning to realize that?" He replied that Alex's newborn stage was just a distant memory for him. "Oh, really," I said, "Because that's all I remember and how horrible it was."
I guess what I'm saying is, it's nice that Marcus is finally realizing the severity of our situation.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Muumuus Is A Fun Word To Say
I think I've made it pretty clear where I stand on maternity clothes. I pretty much despise them. Part of the problem lies in that there is all of one or two places that actually sell maternity clothes that can be tried on. To be honest, they're too expensive and ugly anyway. The only places that I like to purchase my maternity clothes either sell them online or at their flagship stores which, seeing as how I don't live on 5th Avenue, are hard to get to.
I honestly can't complain too much about the tops mostly because I'm super selective about the style of top I wear. Please, do not give me a top that puts a bow between my breasts and the top of my belly and then follow that with some flowing material at the bottom. I really don't want the word "house" used when people describe my current pregnant body state. Other than that really popular clothing atrocity the tops can sometimes be cute.
But the pants? The pants are by far the worst. They never fit in the a$$/thigh region and if they do then that means the hip and above area is insanely uncomfortable because it's too tight. Not to mention the fact that most pants don't come with an entire Lycra panel for the belly is something I'll never understand. What woman wants to see her enormous stomach bisected when she looks in the mirror? I am pretty sure a Ryan Gosling meme of the following will never exist: "Oh, hey, girl. Three sexy belly bulges in one. Keep that up and you'll always be knocked up because you look so damn good, girl." I digress.
The point is, when I look down I don't want to see three very distinct parts of my belly. First, I've got some weird FUPA (look it up...I don't want to be the one who teaches you such things) thing going on at the area where the pants fabric and the Lycra panel are joined. Then, I've got a bulge between there and where the Lycra panel ends just above the midway portion of the belly. Finally, the top of the Lycra panel creates a bulge where the upper part of the belly continues on, up the ribcage to the breasts. It's hideous.
After all of these years of women being pregnant (depending on who you ask millions of years or thousands of years but nevertheless a really long flippin' time) you would think someone would get it right when it comes to designing clothing for pregnant women. Above all else, I should throw in the word "affordable" because that's the other end of the stick. There probably are really nicely designed maternity clothes that fit well and make the wearer feel less house-ish. I guess they're for the 1% (side note: the problem with the 1% is a case of first-world problems, yes?).
This is all to say that from here on out I'd like to wear muumuus and flip-flops every day. I wonder what the dress code policy is for the large, unnamed corporation I work for?
I honestly can't complain too much about the tops mostly because I'm super selective about the style of top I wear. Please, do not give me a top that puts a bow between my breasts and the top of my belly and then follow that with some flowing material at the bottom. I really don't want the word "house" used when people describe my current pregnant body state. Other than that really popular clothing atrocity the tops can sometimes be cute.
But the pants? The pants are by far the worst. They never fit in the a$$/thigh region and if they do then that means the hip and above area is insanely uncomfortable because it's too tight. Not to mention the fact that most pants don't come with an entire Lycra panel for the belly is something I'll never understand. What woman wants to see her enormous stomach bisected when she looks in the mirror? I am pretty sure a Ryan Gosling meme of the following will never exist: "Oh, hey, girl. Three sexy belly bulges in one. Keep that up and you'll always be knocked up because you look so damn good, girl." I digress.
The point is, when I look down I don't want to see three very distinct parts of my belly. First, I've got some weird FUPA (look it up...I don't want to be the one who teaches you such things) thing going on at the area where the pants fabric and the Lycra panel are joined. Then, I've got a bulge between there and where the Lycra panel ends just above the midway portion of the belly. Finally, the top of the Lycra panel creates a bulge where the upper part of the belly continues on, up the ribcage to the breasts. It's hideous.
After all of these years of women being pregnant (depending on who you ask millions of years or thousands of years but nevertheless a really long flippin' time) you would think someone would get it right when it comes to designing clothing for pregnant women. Above all else, I should throw in the word "affordable" because that's the other end of the stick. There probably are really nicely designed maternity clothes that fit well and make the wearer feel less house-ish. I guess they're for the 1% (side note: the problem with the 1% is a case of first-world problems, yes?).
This is all to say that from here on out I'd like to wear muumuus and flip-flops every day. I wonder what the dress code policy is for the large, unnamed corporation I work for?
These Are A Few Of Her Favorite Things
I realized last night that I'm totally missing out on a very important aspect of Alexandra's growth and that is documenting her likes (and dislikes). I'm sad I've missed out on the last few months of keeping track because they change constantly but I'll try and remember what they used to be and then write down what they are now. So, without further ado, and with many apologies to the wonderful Julie Andrews, here are a few of her favorite things:
1. Sitting. I'm not kidding. She loves sitting. Especially on things that are her height. So, whether it's a small step-stool or a stair or a chair made just for her size she gets absolute enjoyment out of sitting on things.
2. Along with that love of sitting comes her love for her small chairs. This one is strange. She drags the chairs everywhere behind her, sets them up in various rooms and sits in them, then drags them around some more. Sometimes, she wants the chairs to join her in another chair as if they're a baby doll or stuffed animal.
3. Milk. This should actually be number 1. Her love of milk knows no bounds. It is the end all, be all for her. If she's cranky, milk is the answer. If she's sleepy, milk is the answer. If she's in a good mood, milk is the answer. If she's sitting, milk is the answer. I cannot even begin to describe how deep her love of milk runs. It's that deep.
4. Second only to milk comes her dada. She is a daddy's girl through and through. When we pull in the driveway the first word I hear is "dada?" When she wakes up, she points towards our bedroom and says "dada?" When dada is there she clings to him like white on rice. This only annoys me when she gets whiny about it which, recently anyway, is often.
5. "Dogdogs" and "keehs." She loves animals. She doesn't want them to touch her but she loves them all the same. She has the keenest of eyes and can spot a dog or cat walking down the street from a mile away. She points and laughs and then subsequently freaks out when they decide to inspect her.
6. Slides. I've already covered that fairly extensively in other posts.
7. Being outside. She's recently started trying to open doors and crying when we tell her we aren't going outside. However, once she is outside she loves it. She loves to walk around or ride in her stroller or play at the playground. It doesn't really matter as long as we are outside.
8. Being pushed in her small, Radioflyer wagon. She dumps everything out of it, climbs in, then whines and cries until someone gives in and pushes her around. That's usually dada and it's a blast to watch them tear around the house, Alex's blond wispies blowing in the wind.
9. Shoes. She loves shoes. I don't know if it's that she likes to try and put them on but we've caught her standing in Marcus's shoes, my shoes, and one time I tried putting a pair of shoes on her feet that were too small so I stopped and you would have thought I'd taken away her milk. She was that upset. Also, she may or may not get this from me. (Quick update: We just purchased a pair of snow boots for the winter and that is all she wants to wear right now).
10. Playing on the trampoline. She doesn't actually jump on it, she bounces a little, but mostly she runs in circles in a very Groucho Marx-esque way.
11. Playing chase. We thought playing chase was fun when she first started walking. Now she's a little faster and decides that it's time to play chase at very inopportune times such as walking to the car, walking out of a store, and other less ideal moments that typically involve traffic and little blond girls running directly for it.
12. "Ta-da!" Marcus recently taught Alex how to stick the landing of a back-flip by raising both arms in a gymnast fashion. Now she does it all of the time. She'll gingerly climb onto an ottoman, slide off, then slowly raise both arms trying to catch your eye and when she's sure you're watching she finishes the "ta-da" with a flourish.
13. Dance parties. We have a Disney theme song CD that begins with a song from Tarzan and the second she hears it she starts bopping up and down. The only crappy part is she soon insists you pick you her up and dance with her in your arms. This would be fine if I weren't 8 months pregnant. She also hasn't figured out the difference between a dance worthy song and one that you can relax to so all music, all the time, is dance party U.S.A. for Alex.
So, I think a dozen or so of Alex's current favorite things are enough. She clearly keeps us very entertained and I know everyone thinks they're own kid is funny but she's really funny and she knows it. Again, I'll take credit for that one because we all know I have the better sense of humor.
1. Sitting. I'm not kidding. She loves sitting. Especially on things that are her height. So, whether it's a small step-stool or a stair or a chair made just for her size she gets absolute enjoyment out of sitting on things.
2. Along with that love of sitting comes her love for her small chairs. This one is strange. She drags the chairs everywhere behind her, sets them up in various rooms and sits in them, then drags them around some more. Sometimes, she wants the chairs to join her in another chair as if they're a baby doll or stuffed animal.
3. Milk. This should actually be number 1. Her love of milk knows no bounds. It is the end all, be all for her. If she's cranky, milk is the answer. If she's sleepy, milk is the answer. If she's in a good mood, milk is the answer. If she's sitting, milk is the answer. I cannot even begin to describe how deep her love of milk runs. It's that deep.
4. Second only to milk comes her dada. She is a daddy's girl through and through. When we pull in the driveway the first word I hear is "dada?" When she wakes up, she points towards our bedroom and says "dada?" When dada is there she clings to him like white on rice. This only annoys me when she gets whiny about it which, recently anyway, is often.
5. "Dogdogs" and "keehs." She loves animals. She doesn't want them to touch her but she loves them all the same. She has the keenest of eyes and can spot a dog or cat walking down the street from a mile away. She points and laughs and then subsequently freaks out when they decide to inspect her.
6. Slides. I've already covered that fairly extensively in other posts.
7. Being outside. She's recently started trying to open doors and crying when we tell her we aren't going outside. However, once she is outside she loves it. She loves to walk around or ride in her stroller or play at the playground. It doesn't really matter as long as we are outside.
8. Being pushed in her small, Radioflyer wagon. She dumps everything out of it, climbs in, then whines and cries until someone gives in and pushes her around. That's usually dada and it's a blast to watch them tear around the house, Alex's blond wispies blowing in the wind.
9. Shoes. She loves shoes. I don't know if it's that she likes to try and put them on but we've caught her standing in Marcus's shoes, my shoes, and one time I tried putting a pair of shoes on her feet that were too small so I stopped and you would have thought I'd taken away her milk. She was that upset. Also, she may or may not get this from me. (Quick update: We just purchased a pair of snow boots for the winter and that is all she wants to wear right now).
10. Playing on the trampoline. She doesn't actually jump on it, she bounces a little, but mostly she runs in circles in a very Groucho Marx-esque way.
11. Playing chase. We thought playing chase was fun when she first started walking. Now she's a little faster and decides that it's time to play chase at very inopportune times such as walking to the car, walking out of a store, and other less ideal moments that typically involve traffic and little blond girls running directly for it.
12. "Ta-da!" Marcus recently taught Alex how to stick the landing of a back-flip by raising both arms in a gymnast fashion. Now she does it all of the time. She'll gingerly climb onto an ottoman, slide off, then slowly raise both arms trying to catch your eye and when she's sure you're watching she finishes the "ta-da" with a flourish.
13. Dance parties. We have a Disney theme song CD that begins with a song from Tarzan and the second she hears it she starts bopping up and down. The only crappy part is she soon insists you pick you her up and dance with her in your arms. This would be fine if I weren't 8 months pregnant. She also hasn't figured out the difference between a dance worthy song and one that you can relax to so all music, all the time, is dance party U.S.A. for Alex.
So, I think a dozen or so of Alex's current favorite things are enough. She clearly keeps us very entertained and I know everyone thinks they're own kid is funny but she's really funny and she knows it. Again, I'll take credit for that one because we all know I have the better sense of humor.
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Alexandra the Great Conquers The Water Park
There are a few days that I look back and wish I could have lived in that moment forever and the other day was no exception. Despite the fact I'm practically out of steam at the moment and Marcus wasn't around to help I agreed to take Alexandra to Water Country, U.S.A. with my sister and her family. I never would have done this alone otherwise because I don't think we would have ever made it back to the car after a sun-filled day of fun.
Alex was a bit trepidatious when we first arrived at one of the three kiddie pools. Like she usually does when thrust into an unknown situation she sat on my lap and silently observed the action taking place around her. For about 10 minutes or so the two of us sat in the shallow water and watched as the other kids and their parents splashed and played around. After a short while Alex began to loosen up and she started venturing out. She didn't exactly cut the cord but she did move about 6 inches away from me so that was a start. After she ventured out she discovered the joy of splashing and she would walk, stop, squat, and splash. She thought that was just the best thing ever. Soon after she discovered she could actually sit down in the water and propel herself around (ah, the beauty of being weightless in water). So, she did laps around me, every now and then climbing onto me so that I could dip her backwards and get her hair wet. I don't think her big semi-toothy grin ever left her face. After a while my sister and I decided it was time for a break and we all sat under the tent drinking water and eating goldfish (an appropriate water park snack if you ask me).
After snack time my sister said there was another kiddie pool that had slides. While Alex is a slide fanatic I never would have guessed she would be into it because I imagine it would look scary to a 17 month old. I was wrong. The minute she saw the slides she was ready to go. All it took was one or two times to show her the proper way to go up the little stairs and slide down and she was on a sliding high. Generally speaking I would get her started then "run" as fast as possible to the other side of the slide where I could coax her to eventually sit down and then catch her at the end. I think Alex got just as much enjoyment climbing to the top of the slide as she did actually going down the slide. She was oblivious to all of the other children clamoring behind her or cutting in front of her. She had her eye on the prize, the top of the stairs, and she was going to make it. Once she got to the top her expression was priceless as she beamed from ear to ear, all six teeth showing, and she laughed as she sat down. She was so proud. Once at the top she would sit down and inch forward until she was sliding down and into the water laughing the whole time. Even the few drops that had her going underwater completely didn't faze her. Instead I would lift her up and she would be laughing and pointing at the other slides for another go-round.
One thing I truly appreciated was the help from other parents. Alex was probably the smallest one playing on the slides and most of the bigger kids either didn't see her in their quest to get down the slide or didn't have the patience for her slowness. Surprisingly, if one of the bigger kids got a little too pushy with her the parents were quick to jump on them and tell them to back away from the baby. It was refreshing that the parents were even around and that they said something at all. I also had help when Alex would get too excited that she had made it to the top and wouldn't sit down to go right away creating a bit of a back-up. A few times a parent would reach-in and sit her down. Otherwise, we might still be there, waiting for her to slide.
Unfortunately, Marcus missed out on the action because he was busy working which was a huge bummer. I wish he could have seen her face every time she got to the top of a slide. I hope that memory stays with me forever. It makes me anticipate more of those smiles and the many accomplishments I'm sure she will achieve throughout her lifetime.
Alex was a bit trepidatious when we first arrived at one of the three kiddie pools. Like she usually does when thrust into an unknown situation she sat on my lap and silently observed the action taking place around her. For about 10 minutes or so the two of us sat in the shallow water and watched as the other kids and their parents splashed and played around. After a short while Alex began to loosen up and she started venturing out. She didn't exactly cut the cord but she did move about 6 inches away from me so that was a start. After she ventured out she discovered the joy of splashing and she would walk, stop, squat, and splash. She thought that was just the best thing ever. Soon after she discovered she could actually sit down in the water and propel herself around (ah, the beauty of being weightless in water). So, she did laps around me, every now and then climbing onto me so that I could dip her backwards and get her hair wet. I don't think her big semi-toothy grin ever left her face. After a while my sister and I decided it was time for a break and we all sat under the tent drinking water and eating goldfish (an appropriate water park snack if you ask me).
After snack time my sister said there was another kiddie pool that had slides. While Alex is a slide fanatic I never would have guessed she would be into it because I imagine it would look scary to a 17 month old. I was wrong. The minute she saw the slides she was ready to go. All it took was one or two times to show her the proper way to go up the little stairs and slide down and she was on a sliding high. Generally speaking I would get her started then "run" as fast as possible to the other side of the slide where I could coax her to eventually sit down and then catch her at the end. I think Alex got just as much enjoyment climbing to the top of the slide as she did actually going down the slide. She was oblivious to all of the other children clamoring behind her or cutting in front of her. She had her eye on the prize, the top of the stairs, and she was going to make it. Once she got to the top her expression was priceless as she beamed from ear to ear, all six teeth showing, and she laughed as she sat down. She was so proud. Once at the top she would sit down and inch forward until she was sliding down and into the water laughing the whole time. Even the few drops that had her going underwater completely didn't faze her. Instead I would lift her up and she would be laughing and pointing at the other slides for another go-round.
One thing I truly appreciated was the help from other parents. Alex was probably the smallest one playing on the slides and most of the bigger kids either didn't see her in their quest to get down the slide or didn't have the patience for her slowness. Surprisingly, if one of the bigger kids got a little too pushy with her the parents were quick to jump on them and tell them to back away from the baby. It was refreshing that the parents were even around and that they said something at all. I also had help when Alex would get too excited that she had made it to the top and wouldn't sit down to go right away creating a bit of a back-up. A few times a parent would reach-in and sit her down. Otherwise, we might still be there, waiting for her to slide.
Unfortunately, Marcus missed out on the action because he was busy working which was a huge bummer. I wish he could have seen her face every time she got to the top of a slide. I hope that memory stays with me forever. It makes me anticipate more of those smiles and the many accomplishments I'm sure she will achieve throughout her lifetime.
 |
| Fearless |
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Jack Sprat And Me
It's official. I outweigh my 6'2" tall husband. Despite all of my efforts to fatten him up, such as encouraging nightly ice cream sessions and Carl's milkshake excursions, he has barely gained an ounce. He also denies he's skinnier than usual but when your wife, mother, and best friend all comment on your lack of meat on the bones then something isn't right. It's high time he start packing on the sympathy pounds, I say! Nay, I DEMAND! From here on out Marcus will eat nothing but McDonald's for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Actually, strike that, I don't want him to die. From here on out Marcus will eat nothing but candy and ice cream for breakfast, lunch, and dinner! Huzzah!
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
My Dream
Someone once told me that when you dream of a loved one who has passed on it's their way of telling you they're OK. Last night I dreamt of my grandmother and she quite literally told me she was OK. In the dream she was alive but knew she was dying and she was OK with that and she handed me a Hallmark greeting card that basically read as much. Even in the dream I thought to myself that it's awfully strange Hallmark makes greeting cards that state "I'm dying but I'm OK" but then realized they've probably got the market cornered on just about every greeting card one can imagine. Anyway, after I read the card she said she had organized all of her affairs (which is true because every now and then a box is found with directions on who to give it to) but that she had one last surprise before she died. After that, I don't know if I continued dreaming or if I woke up but either way that was the end of what I remember of my grandma dream.
It's nice to know she's OK and happy. I don't know what might have prompted my dream about her though her birthday is coming up in early September. The psyche is such a strange being but I'm glad it allowed me more time with her. I still miss her.
It's nice to know she's OK and happy. I don't know what might have prompted my dream about her though her birthday is coming up in early September. The psyche is such a strange being but I'm glad it allowed me more time with her. I still miss her.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Birth Plans = Waste Of Time
Because I'm a glutton for punishment, and I get a lot of amusement out of it, I've been perusing the chat forum I joined back when I was newly pregnant with Alex. I stumbled upon a gem of a discussion about birth plans and all of these women are just completely, flippin' insane, nipple stimulation and all.
First of all, I have never once heard a woman say that she had a birth plan and was able to follow it to a "T." More often than not you hear "I had a birth plan but the birth itself didn't actually go that way..." Sh*t happens and when the time comes you do what you have to do to deliver that baby and that's all that matters.
Second, there is no planning; you have no control over delivering a baby. Sorry. It's Mother Nature at it's finest and, when necessary, medical science intervenes. You may be able to control certain aspects of it like, being able to hold your baby right away, but other than that there is really little else you can control.
Third, we're talking about babies. That baby will be born one way or the other and whether you make a plan or not doesn't really matter.
Fourth, ugh. Just ugh.
I realize three of my four complaints seem rather redundant. I could probably roll them all into one giant complaint but where's the fun in that? Besides, I like to repeat what I said in various ways so that I get my point across. The bottom line is, it's better to go into this whole adventure with an open mind. I have a girlfriend the other day who recently said she didn't care either way how the baby was born, i.e. she has no expectations for the delivery. How refreshing. No wonder she's my friend.
Anyway, I tried to find more posts from the ladies who had posted their birth plans to see if any of them had written about their actual births but with little luck. Too bad. I would have been curious to know if the nipple stimulation worked the way one particular mother-to-be had hoped for (whatever that is...I don't really want to know).
First of all, I have never once heard a woman say that she had a birth plan and was able to follow it to a "T." More often than not you hear "I had a birth plan but the birth itself didn't actually go that way..." Sh*t happens and when the time comes you do what you have to do to deliver that baby and that's all that matters.
Second, there is no planning; you have no control over delivering a baby. Sorry. It's Mother Nature at it's finest and, when necessary, medical science intervenes. You may be able to control certain aspects of it like, being able to hold your baby right away, but other than that there is really little else you can control.
Third, we're talking about babies. That baby will be born one way or the other and whether you make a plan or not doesn't really matter.
Fourth, ugh. Just ugh.
I realize three of my four complaints seem rather redundant. I could probably roll them all into one giant complaint but where's the fun in that? Besides, I like to repeat what I said in various ways so that I get my point across. The bottom line is, it's better to go into this whole adventure with an open mind. I have a girlfriend the other day who recently said she didn't care either way how the baby was born, i.e. she has no expectations for the delivery. How refreshing. No wonder she's my friend.
Anyway, I tried to find more posts from the ladies who had posted their birth plans to see if any of them had written about their actual births but with little luck. Too bad. I would have been curious to know if the nipple stimulation worked the way one particular mother-to-be had hoped for (whatever that is...I don't really want to know).
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Today
Today is a big day.
Today I am 30 weeks pregnant. That gives us 10 weeks to get everything in order. Or, if you're going by Alex's premature delivery date, 5 weeks. I'm still feeling remarkably good despite the fact I'm about as big as I was when 8 months pregnant with Alex. I suppose it's from my belly already being stretched out from before. Ask me in about 2 months how I feel and I'll probably murder you on the spot. No offense. I've still somehow managed to stay active in ballet and glide across the floor with all of the grace of a hippopotamus (when on land, not in water...they seriously are very graceful when swimming). The baby is getting stronger by the day and sometimes surprises me with quick jabs to the belly especially since (s)he has been more of a relaxer than a tae kwon do master.
Today is also Marcus's and my 3 year anniversary. 3 years and almost 2 kids later. It's amazing how much has changed in such a short span of time. Unfortunately, Marcus isn't around to celebrate with me and that's a huge bummer. So far this year he's been absent for Valentine's Day and now our anniversary (I won't even mention the lack of even a card on Mother's Day). I'm going to assume he'll be around for the birth of our second child (which trumps both Valentine's Day and our anniversary combined) but you know what happens when you assume...
Today I signed-up to take both of my psychology classes at the same time in preparation for this next kiddo. My thought process went a little something like this: Hey! You know what sounds like a great idea and not at all stressful?! Taking two classes at the same time because they'll end on October 12th. So, if I do that, and work my a$$ off to finish before October 12th, then I'll have the rest of the year to take-off from school and tend to the baby and Alex. That makes complete sense doesn't it? The only way this could fail is if the baby arrives earlier than expected. Also, this could fail if I end up having a complete break-down which I'm pretty much banking on.
Today I've also realized that I am in a funk. I don't want to go anywhere, see anyone, or do anything. I'm quite content to go to work during the day and hang out at home with Alex during the evening. Anything else is annoying and really, just a burden. To go anywhere at all takes a lot of effort and planning and I just don't have it in me. Even a trip to the library (which is coming because I have a research paper due) sounds like a huge pain in the a$$ to me. Not to mention I have Alex with me all of the time which means chasing after her and constantly making sure she is happy because, despite what most people think, the saying actually goes "If baby ain't happy, ain't nobody happy". Also, I think by now it goes without saying, I'm 7.5 months pregnant. I'm tired. Life can pass me by for all I care just as long as I'm able to sit on the couch and eat my ice cream.
Today I am 30 weeks pregnant. That gives us 10 weeks to get everything in order. Or, if you're going by Alex's premature delivery date, 5 weeks. I'm still feeling remarkably good despite the fact I'm about as big as I was when 8 months pregnant with Alex. I suppose it's from my belly already being stretched out from before. Ask me in about 2 months how I feel and I'll probably murder you on the spot. No offense. I've still somehow managed to stay active in ballet and glide across the floor with all of the grace of a hippopotamus (when on land, not in water...they seriously are very graceful when swimming). The baby is getting stronger by the day and sometimes surprises me with quick jabs to the belly especially since (s)he has been more of a relaxer than a tae kwon do master.
Today is also Marcus's and my 3 year anniversary. 3 years and almost 2 kids later. It's amazing how much has changed in such a short span of time. Unfortunately, Marcus isn't around to celebrate with me and that's a huge bummer. So far this year he's been absent for Valentine's Day and now our anniversary (I won't even mention the lack of even a card on Mother's Day). I'm going to assume he'll be around for the birth of our second child (which trumps both Valentine's Day and our anniversary combined) but you know what happens when you assume...
Today I signed-up to take both of my psychology classes at the same time in preparation for this next kiddo. My thought process went a little something like this: Hey! You know what sounds like a great idea and not at all stressful?! Taking two classes at the same time because they'll end on October 12th. So, if I do that, and work my a$$ off to finish before October 12th, then I'll have the rest of the year to take-off from school and tend to the baby and Alex. That makes complete sense doesn't it? The only way this could fail is if the baby arrives earlier than expected. Also, this could fail if I end up having a complete break-down which I'm pretty much banking on.
Today I've also realized that I am in a funk. I don't want to go anywhere, see anyone, or do anything. I'm quite content to go to work during the day and hang out at home with Alex during the evening. Anything else is annoying and really, just a burden. To go anywhere at all takes a lot of effort and planning and I just don't have it in me. Even a trip to the library (which is coming because I have a research paper due) sounds like a huge pain in the a$$ to me. Not to mention I have Alex with me all of the time which means chasing after her and constantly making sure she is happy because, despite what most people think, the saying actually goes "If baby ain't happy, ain't nobody happy". Also, I think by now it goes without saying, I'm 7.5 months pregnant. I'm tired. Life can pass me by for all I care just as long as I'm able to sit on the couch and eat my ice cream.
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