Mr. Fashionista

I love my husband. I really, really do. But (there’s always a “but”) sometimes I just have to shake my head at his actions. Before I get started I have to give him credit because while I go to work 5 days a week, kicking and screaming, he stays home with the kiddo 3 days a week. Add that to my inability to wake-up on time and he is the sole dresser of the babe in the mornings (not to mention we have a serious case of daddy’s girl on our hands). Now, we all know most* men have little to no sense of fashion, especially when it comes to little girls, so it is my belief that baby clothing is designed in just such a way that it’s hard to mess up, i.e. everything generally matches unless you throw in the odd salmon or lavender color. In short, Alex is typically matching if nothing else. Where Marcus gets it wrong is in the sizing.

Now, we all know where Marcus falls on the cheapness scale, (where your husband is cheap mine is infinitely more cheap) and I know that having to purchase new clothes for a baby every 3 months wears on the wallet, but stuffing a  bratwurst into a Vienna sausage casing simply does not work. In case you missed the imagery there what I’m trying to say is, putting a 6 month old baby in a 3 month size onesie isn't happening. Luckily, I was home during the most recent episode of “Alex stuffing” and was able to prevent her suffering from chaffed thighs and nip slips and quickly got her into a more appropriately sized outfit. When I asked Marcus why he dressed her in such an obviously small outfit his reply was that since it’s in the drawer it’s still wearable regardless of size. A few rolls of the eyes (mine) later I promptly set about putting away her 0-3 month clothing so as to avoid any more Janet Jackson-esque exposures. Reflecting back what I find most ironic is that in roughly 15 years (God, please let her stay an innocent, beautiful child for at least 15 more years) he’ll be begging her to put on less form fitting clothing as he goes about cleaning the shotgun.

*I say most because I do realize some of the gents are very nice dressers and they do it all by themselves wearing their big boy pants.