I received a phone call this morning from Alex's daycare informing me that one of the other children had bit Alex hard enough to break the skin. My very first thought upon hearing this was "How the hell did they manage to do that when she was wearing jeans?!" The biter must have some set of chompers on him or her. Then I wondered what Alex did to deserve such a biting. She was in a terribly bad mood this morning so who knows if she said or did something mean. Marcus then reminded me that she was probably in a bad mood this morning because I have little patience for what she thinks is a fun changing routine. This basically involves a lot of crying, alligator death rolls, and the ever popular "limp baby" when I'm trying to pull her pants up. Only 13 short months of life and she knows all the tricks of the trade. Anyway, the whole situation makes me sad because Alex has now come into contact with her first bully. I was kind of hoping we'd be forced to deal with this a few years down the line. Luckily, her memory is only about two weeks long so this episode should fade quickly. I just hope that whoever did bite her keeps on their guard because I've seen the size of the teeth Alex has coming in and they are no joke.
Update, 28-MAR-2012: If the daycare hadn't informed us of the biting incident I never would have realized anything was wrong. There was barely a mark on her at all. I think they were a bit over-dramatic in their description of the bite.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Friday, March 16, 2012
And She's Off!
Well, folks, we have a walker. Alex took her first official steps at the beginning of March and in the past two weeks she's progressed to walking short (very short) distances usually between whatever she is holding onto and either Marcus or I. And she does it with the best sh*t eating grin you've ever seen. She knows she's doing something big. Of course, she's also probably grinning because Marcus and I are typically laughing our heads off as she stumbles around like a drunken fool. I really have never seen anyone run into walls as much as Alex. Not even at 2:00 in the morning, after last call, have I seen such stumbling. Luckily, she's a pretty happy "drunk" and laughs it off rather than getting pissed off at the wall for getting in her way (I'm pretty sure we all have one of those friends). She's also come close to a face-plant or two which I have definitely seen her father do on one or more occasion after a night of fun. I digress.
This walking thing is really going to send our world upside down, not like Alex herself hasn't already done so. For now we're able to keep up with her diaper butt and keep her out of trouble but I foresee that once she really starts motoring around things are going to change. The bookcases are going to have to be rearranged, Alex will probably take care of that for us, and just about anything else within a 3' reach from the ground will have to be removed. Oh, Lord. I don't know if I'm ready for this!
This walking thing is really going to send our world upside down, not like Alex herself hasn't already done so. For now we're able to keep up with her diaper butt and keep her out of trouble but I foresee that once she really starts motoring around things are going to change. The bookcases are going to have to be rearranged, Alex will probably take care of that for us, and just about anything else within a 3' reach from the ground will have to be removed. Oh, Lord. I don't know if I'm ready for this!
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Ballet
I elegantly slide my foot into the canvas shoe and tighten the drawstring in anticipation of my long-awaited return to the ballet barre. As I gracefully walk across the floor, head held high, stomach lean and taut, legs long and limber, shoulders back I think of how amazing it will be to put 13 years of previously unused knowledge to use. As the instructor begins I claim my spot at the head of the class not wanting to miss a thing. My plies are perfect; Entendues enchanting; Arabesque's amazing. I pirouette across the room in a blur of beauty. Everyone must wonder who this magnificent creature is. Where did she come from? Who trained her? It is as if Anna Pavlova herself is channeling my body in her final performance of the Dying Swan.
What really happened:
I fuss with my new canvas ballet shoes hoping the shoddy stitch job I did on the straps hold up during class. For 13 years I never had to sew a thing because my mom always did. The night before I was half-tempted to call her at 9:00 and ask if she would finish sewing the straps on for me. As I stand up and readjust my outfit I see in the mirror bulges that were not there earlier when I first got dressed at home. Damnit. Where did those come from? I plod across the floor trying to ignore the belly pushing my pants down and wishing I had remembered to put on deodorant and brushed my teeth. I would hate to be asked not to return due to a lack of personal hygiene. The instructor starts the class. "Eh, this is easy enough," I think as we begin warming up at the barre. 5 minutes later and I'm lost. "What the hell is a frappe?! I mean, I know what it is at Starbucks." "Sh*t. Why is everyone facing me now? Oh, hell. I shoulda turned around back there." Once our warm-up is complete we head to the middle of the floor. Everyone else vies for a position in front of the mirror while I hide behind a column. It gets a little blurry (literally) here because I forget the cardinal rule of pirouettes, which is spotting, and I fight back the nausea creeping up, putting my head between my legs. At some point we gather in the corner to leap and twirl across the room in hopes of appearing light and airy. At each landing I hit the floor with a thud, the mirrors shake and the ceiling above cracks and crumbles onto my head. I swear I hear an elephant herd nearby but I realize I must be dreaming. We're nowhere near the Serengeti, silly! Finally, our instructor calls it quits, disheartened I'm sure by the repairs to the ceiling she will now have to make after tonight's lesson. I make my way back to my bag and change into my street clothes feeling satisfied I had the guts to return to ballet. As I wave goodbye to the instructor and head downstairs I swear I hear the trumpeting of elephants but quickly realize it is the instructor weeping. I must have made that big of an impression on her.
What really happened:
I fuss with my new canvas ballet shoes hoping the shoddy stitch job I did on the straps hold up during class. For 13 years I never had to sew a thing because my mom always did. The night before I was half-tempted to call her at 9:00 and ask if she would finish sewing the straps on for me. As I stand up and readjust my outfit I see in the mirror bulges that were not there earlier when I first got dressed at home. Damnit. Where did those come from? I plod across the floor trying to ignore the belly pushing my pants down and wishing I had remembered to put on deodorant and brushed my teeth. I would hate to be asked not to return due to a lack of personal hygiene. The instructor starts the class. "Eh, this is easy enough," I think as we begin warming up at the barre. 5 minutes later and I'm lost. "What the hell is a frappe?! I mean, I know what it is at Starbucks." "Sh*t. Why is everyone facing me now? Oh, hell. I shoulda turned around back there." Once our warm-up is complete we head to the middle of the floor. Everyone else vies for a position in front of the mirror while I hide behind a column. It gets a little blurry (literally) here because I forget the cardinal rule of pirouettes, which is spotting, and I fight back the nausea creeping up, putting my head between my legs. At some point we gather in the corner to leap and twirl across the room in hopes of appearing light and airy. At each landing I hit the floor with a thud, the mirrors shake and the ceiling above cracks and crumbles onto my head. I swear I hear an elephant herd nearby but I realize I must be dreaming. We're nowhere near the Serengeti, silly! Finally, our instructor calls it quits, disheartened I'm sure by the repairs to the ceiling she will now have to make after tonight's lesson. I make my way back to my bag and change into my street clothes feeling satisfied I had the guts to return to ballet. As I wave goodbye to the instructor and head downstairs I swear I hear the trumpeting of elephants but quickly realize it is the instructor weeping. I must have made that big of an impression on her.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Happy 1st Birthday!
Well, I can't believe it but today is Alexandra's first birthday. It is amazing to me how quickly this past year went. Between hardly getting any sleep and constant diaper changes it's amazing Marcus and I survived and feel like it all went by way too fast. The changes we all have gone through in 12 months are amazing but none more so than Alexandra herself. She went from a crying, barely cognizant, tiny person to a mobile, Buddha bellied, full of personality person. To capture that here are a few of her stats:
Weight:
19 pounds 2 ounces
19 pounds 2 ounces
Height:
29.5"
29.5"
Teeth:
Her two front, bottom teeth are just poking through
Her two front, bottom teeth are just poking through
Hair:
Thicker and blonder but still barely there
Thicker and blonder but still barely there
Words:
"Mamma," "dadda," "keh" (kitty), and "ball." We are currently working on "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious."
"Mamma," "dadda," "keh" (kitty), and "ball." We are currently working on "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious."
Favorite games:
Rolling the ball; stacking her colored rings; using her shape sorter; "chase" which equates to her crawling away very fast then slowing down to hear if you're coming, speeding it up when she hears you coming and laughing her head off; clapping her hands or anything that makes a pleasing (to her) sound; pushing her wagon back and forth a million times; hugging her stuffed animals; helping load and unload the dishwasher; reorganizing the Tupperware drawer; giving open mouth kisses which could explain why I'm home from work today; and putting her forehead on our forehead, eyes looking into ours, while flicking her tongue in and out like a lizard thus sending us over the edge with laughter.
Rolling the ball; stacking her colored rings; using her shape sorter; "chase" which equates to her crawling away very fast then slowing down to hear if you're coming, speeding it up when she hears you coming and laughing her head off; clapping her hands or anything that makes a pleasing (to her) sound; pushing her wagon back and forth a million times; hugging her stuffed animals; helping load and unload the dishwasher; reorganizing the Tupperware drawer; giving open mouth kisses which could explain why I'm home from work today; and putting her forehead on our forehead, eyes looking into ours, while flicking her tongue in and out like a lizard thus sending us over the edge with laughter.
Favorite songs:
"The Wheels on the Bus," "Itsy Bitsy Spider," "Over the Rainbow," "Hush, Little Baby," and Bach's Concerto in D.
"The Wheels on the Bus," "Itsy Bitsy Spider," "Over the Rainbow," "Hush, Little Baby," and Bach's Concerto in D.
We are working on:
Waving bye-bye, being gentle with Lasagna (not to mention mamma and dadda), walking, multiplication, and listening better.
Waving bye-bye, being gentle with Lasagna (not to mention mamma and dadda), walking, multiplication, and listening better.
Milestones reached:
To be honest I have no idea if she's reached her milestones or not. I know she does things some babies her age do and she doesn't do things some babies her age do. I don't really care as long as she's happy which she is about 95% of the time. The other 5% of the time tends to go downhill during nap time or bed time when she's not exactly thrilled to be left behind in her room.
To be honest I have no idea if she's reached her milestones or not. I know she does things some babies her age do and she doesn't do things some babies her age do. I don't really care as long as she's happy which she is about 95% of the time. The other 5% of the time tends to go downhill during nap time or bed time when she's not exactly thrilled to be left behind in her room.
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| Happy 1st Birthday! |
Friday, February 17, 2012
Frickin' College Kids
As another reminder of the fact we are surrounded by idiots or, to be more exact, college students, we were awakened last Friday to a person pounding on our front door. It didn't necessarily scare me out of my sleep but it certainly woke me up and when it registered what was going on, I got a little miffed. Marcus, who was lying next to me, calmly pulled the curtain back and watched as a few "goofy white kids" (his words) took off running towards the UMW campus. The next morning we also discovered that all of the cars parked in the street in front of the house had been tampered with as all of the side-view mirrors had been pushed in. This is what set me over the edge and I immediately vowed revenge. It's one thing for us to hear shouting and other randomness as the drunks stumble home from the bars in the middle of the night. To be honest we expect a certain amount of noise living close to a college campus and really, we've learned to drown out any extraneous noises unless it is unreasonable. But, it's a completely different thing when they start messing with, and trespassing onto, my private property with the sole intention of harassing my family and me. While Marcus brushes it off as college kids being college kids I, and about 99% of our friends, disagree. Pounding on someone's door and running away is something I would expect from a bunch of 10 year old boys whose balls haven't dropped (I'm going to be honest, I don't know when boy's balls drop and I don't really want to look it up on the Internet while at work but I'm thinking 10 is a reasonable age). College students should, and do, know better and no, Marcus's argument that I probably knew people in college who pulled this sh*t doesn't hold. If I did know anyone acting this way their targets were more than likely friends, not random families.
The problem is, how do I go about making sure they know I'm not going to put up with it anymore? I use the word "I" here because I do believe I stand alone in this crusade. A call to the police won't really do any good. I can only imagine, as the police are standing at the front door and I'm giving them a description of the "goofy white kid," Marcus emerges, behind me. "Ma'am!" they would shout, "He's right behind you! Remain calm...Sir, put your hands up where I can see them. Drop to the ground!" So, yeah. That won't work. Plus, by the time the police showed up the perps would be long gone. Other ideas have been thrown out but they're all along the lines of booby traps, a la Home Alone. Tar and feathers was a good idea but that sounds like a nightmare to clean up. Icing the front steps would be perfect if it wasn't 70 degrees outside despite it being the middle of February. Heating the front door so that it burns red-hot sounds like a huge waste of time, money, and energy and I try to be earth friendly. Pretending a party is going on all night wouldn't be too hard but I really like my sleep and I'm sure the fake-party noises would keep me up. So, in short, I really feel there is only one option left. We must get a dog. And, might I make a suggestion, because I've done a lot of research on what makes an excellent guard dog. I've heard that the French bulldog is a particularly nasty, vicious breed that was bred for maiming human beings (as evidenced in the picture below). It would be just the right dog for us and just the right message to send to those worthless college kids.
The problem is, how do I go about making sure they know I'm not going to put up with it anymore? I use the word "I" here because I do believe I stand alone in this crusade. A call to the police won't really do any good. I can only imagine, as the police are standing at the front door and I'm giving them a description of the "goofy white kid," Marcus emerges, behind me. "Ma'am!" they would shout, "He's right behind you! Remain calm...Sir, put your hands up where I can see them. Drop to the ground!" So, yeah. That won't work. Plus, by the time the police showed up the perps would be long gone. Other ideas have been thrown out but they're all along the lines of booby traps, a la Home Alone. Tar and feathers was a good idea but that sounds like a nightmare to clean up. Icing the front steps would be perfect if it wasn't 70 degrees outside despite it being the middle of February. Heating the front door so that it burns red-hot sounds like a huge waste of time, money, and energy and I try to be earth friendly. Pretending a party is going on all night wouldn't be too hard but I really like my sleep and I'm sure the fake-party noises would keep me up. So, in short, I really feel there is only one option left. We must get a dog. And, might I make a suggestion, because I've done a lot of research on what makes an excellent guard dog. I've heard that the French bulldog is a particularly nasty, vicious breed that was bred for maiming human beings (as evidenced in the picture below). It would be just the right dog for us and just the right message to send to those worthless college kids.
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Friday, February 10, 2012
Teeth, aka, Toofies!
Yesterday, it was brought to my attention by one of Alex's daycare teachers that she had a tooth! This A. Got me very excited because, finally! and B. Made me feel like an inadequate mother because I didn't even notice. In my defense though, the child has been "teething" for approximately 9 months now. Anytime something would start to seem weird, like her sleep habits changed or we found ourselves changing her outfit three times a day due to the amount of drool she was producing, I always blamed it on teething. She has a fever? Teething. Cranky? Teething. Feeling hungover? Teething. So, you see. I'm not a lousy mother it's just that after so many times crying wolf I came to the conclusion she was just never going to have any teeth and we would eventually have to get her fitted for dentures. My sister's step-daughter had a perfect solution for Alex the other day: wooden teeth. Luckily, we won't have to go that route at this time but I think she's on to something. Come to think of it, didn't a certain, really important American political figure have wooden teeth? And if you think I'm comparing my one year old to George Washington and thereby implying that she will one day be President of the United States of America. Well, you would be correct. This is, of course, after she's already made her millions with her singing talent and set Mommy and Daddy up in a villa on the Mediterranean.
UPDATE: 17 February 2012, we have two teeth! This would explain the horrible crankiness and refusal to eat. I'm beginning to recognize the signs and it's only taken a year!
UPDATE: 17 February 2012, we have two teeth! This would explain the horrible crankiness and refusal to eat. I'm beginning to recognize the signs and it's only taken a year!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Almost 1 Year Old Updates
The question was recently posed to me about what new things Alex is doing these days. As I wrote my response I realized I should be putting it in a blog post. So, drum roll please, here are just some of the latest and greatest achievements in Alex's life!
First of all, we're working on standing. It's not frequent and it always happens by accident. Typically, she's rummaging around in her toy chest, which is super cute to watch because she can barely reach down, into it without having to stand on her tippy-toes. She'll stand on one foot on her toes with the other foot extended elegantly behind her as she reaches for the object of her desire. I don't care what Marcus says, she was clearly born to be a ballerina. Anyone with extension such as that is destined for the stage. Anyway, after she's reached her goal she'll stand, holding on to her toy, not realizing she's perfectly balanced between her two feet. It's just a matter of time now before she takes those first, tentative steps.
Another new trick of Alex's is her burgeoning ability to wave "bye-bye." She pretty much does it on her own and when she's asked to do it she doesn't. Instead she sits there, staring, looking at all of the damn fools surrounding her, until we turn to leave and she starts taking her entire arm and moving it up and down. This morning when I dropped her off at daycare I watched as she turned in her highchair and waved at her friends who were playing on the floor. They didn't notice and she didn't notice that they didn't notice but the whole thing made me sad and it got me thinking about when she's older and her friends ignore her and potentially make her sad how will I react? Probably not very well.
The other day I taught Alex how to kiss which sounds wildly inappropriate but I can assure you, it is not. It started while we were playing with all of her stuffed animals. One by one I brought them up to her face and gave her a "kiss." After two or three times she started leaning in for it. So, then, on a whim I went in for the kill and she responded so sweetly by leaning forward with her lips pressed together. She's such a good kisser that in just a matter of a few short days she's learned a few variations: Open mouth, which she doesn't necessarily save for those closest to her; Slip-o'-the-tongue, which is not as appealing as it sounds; or, lips-pursed-together-style which, out of all three, is the kind I prefer. Again, when I try and show people her new trick she does not comply thus making me look like a total fool. I'm beginning to suspect she does this on purpose.
A favorite new game of hers is rolling the ball back and forth. She loves it so much her little legs kick the floor in anticipation. She also likes to make sure all parties are involved. If she is playing with one person but sees another person sitting on the couch she'll roll it to the person on the couch. If she is playing with one person in the living room and sees someone in the kitchen she'll crawl towards them with her ball, sit in the middle of the floor, and roll the ball between the two. I'm not sure where she gets this whole sharing thing because it's something I've never been very good at especially if it involves anything of the french fry variety. It must be something they teach in daycare.
Finally, we've been struggling with her food intake for quite a while now. She just wasn't interested in what we were feeding her. We made all of her food from the time she was 6 months old and, up until December, she devoured everything we made. Then, it was like a switch went off and she was no longer interested. Part of the problem came from the urgency we felt to get her to eat chunkier food rather than pureed. We started giving her all chunky food and the texture really threw her off. Then, I think she became not so fond of our cooking and would stick a tentative tongue out to taste what was on the spoon only to immediately turn her head away. This went on for a very long time. We finally found a few solutions one of which was ground up spaghetti and another of which was adding pureed baby food as a type of gravy to the more solid, chunky food. Now, we've moved on to her feeding herself and things seems to be going much better. The only problem that comes with self-feeding is she hoards her food in her cheeks like a chipmunk only she isn't a chipmunk so then she starts choking and gagging and, well, you can guess what happens next. This is becoming a nightly routine and one I am not fond of but we're working on it. So far, some of her favorite foods are spaghetti, pizza, pirogues, and kielbasa. She is a bit of a Polish girl after all! One other thing she does is she drinks from her sippy cup and boy, the way she drinks from it, you'd think she'd been lost in the Sahara for months. She takes the cup, tilts it all the way up, and chugs, and chugs, and chugs, then stops for a quick breather, then she's back at it again. By the time she's done she does look a bit like she's been in a desert, or working out really hard, because her entire front is soaked through.
There aren't any real updates on the vocabulary front though it's obvious she understands quite a bit. If I ask her to bring something to me she will do it (only after like, 20 requests), and she definitely understands "no-no" though very rarely complies and instead looks at me with the most mischievous grin. She knows where she's allowed to be in the house and where she isn't allowed to be though she typically gives herself away by laughing as she puts it into hyper-drive and crawls towards the forbidden zones. She's also very interested in the electronic gadgets though mostly she wants to chew on them. After removing it from her mouth a million times it soon dawns on us that this has been a game the whole time and we are just her pawns. All in all I'm pretty sure we're in for it over the next few years. This girl clearly has a mind of her own and she isn't afraid to use it and you know what? I'm OK with that.
First of all, we're working on standing. It's not frequent and it always happens by accident. Typically, she's rummaging around in her toy chest, which is super cute to watch because she can barely reach down, into it without having to stand on her tippy-toes. She'll stand on one foot on her toes with the other foot extended elegantly behind her as she reaches for the object of her desire. I don't care what Marcus says, she was clearly born to be a ballerina. Anyone with extension such as that is destined for the stage. Anyway, after she's reached her goal she'll stand, holding on to her toy, not realizing she's perfectly balanced between her two feet. It's just a matter of time now before she takes those first, tentative steps.
Another new trick of Alex's is her burgeoning ability to wave "bye-bye." She pretty much does it on her own and when she's asked to do it she doesn't. Instead she sits there, staring, looking at all of the damn fools surrounding her, until we turn to leave and she starts taking her entire arm and moving it up and down. This morning when I dropped her off at daycare I watched as she turned in her highchair and waved at her friends who were playing on the floor. They didn't notice and she didn't notice that they didn't notice but the whole thing made me sad and it got me thinking about when she's older and her friends ignore her and potentially make her sad how will I react? Probably not very well.
The other day I taught Alex how to kiss which sounds wildly inappropriate but I can assure you, it is not. It started while we were playing with all of her stuffed animals. One by one I brought them up to her face and gave her a "kiss." After two or three times she started leaning in for it. So, then, on a whim I went in for the kill and she responded so sweetly by leaning forward with her lips pressed together. She's such a good kisser that in just a matter of a few short days she's learned a few variations: Open mouth, which she doesn't necessarily save for those closest to her; Slip-o'-the-tongue, which is not as appealing as it sounds; or, lips-pursed-together-style which, out of all three, is the kind I prefer. Again, when I try and show people her new trick she does not comply thus making me look like a total fool. I'm beginning to suspect she does this on purpose.
A favorite new game of hers is rolling the ball back and forth. She loves it so much her little legs kick the floor in anticipation. She also likes to make sure all parties are involved. If she is playing with one person but sees another person sitting on the couch she'll roll it to the person on the couch. If she is playing with one person in the living room and sees someone in the kitchen she'll crawl towards them with her ball, sit in the middle of the floor, and roll the ball between the two. I'm not sure where she gets this whole sharing thing because it's something I've never been very good at especially if it involves anything of the french fry variety. It must be something they teach in daycare.
Finally, we've been struggling with her food intake for quite a while now. She just wasn't interested in what we were feeding her. We made all of her food from the time she was 6 months old and, up until December, she devoured everything we made. Then, it was like a switch went off and she was no longer interested. Part of the problem came from the urgency we felt to get her to eat chunkier food rather than pureed. We started giving her all chunky food and the texture really threw her off. Then, I think she became not so fond of our cooking and would stick a tentative tongue out to taste what was on the spoon only to immediately turn her head away. This went on for a very long time. We finally found a few solutions one of which was ground up spaghetti and another of which was adding pureed baby food as a type of gravy to the more solid, chunky food. Now, we've moved on to her feeding herself and things seems to be going much better. The only problem that comes with self-feeding is she hoards her food in her cheeks like a chipmunk only she isn't a chipmunk so then she starts choking and gagging and, well, you can guess what happens next. This is becoming a nightly routine and one I am not fond of but we're working on it. So far, some of her favorite foods are spaghetti, pizza, pirogues, and kielbasa. She is a bit of a Polish girl after all! One other thing she does is she drinks from her sippy cup and boy, the way she drinks from it, you'd think she'd been lost in the Sahara for months. She takes the cup, tilts it all the way up, and chugs, and chugs, and chugs, then stops for a quick breather, then she's back at it again. By the time she's done she does look a bit like she's been in a desert, or working out really hard, because her entire front is soaked through.
There aren't any real updates on the vocabulary front though it's obvious she understands quite a bit. If I ask her to bring something to me she will do it (only after like, 20 requests), and she definitely understands "no-no" though very rarely complies and instead looks at me with the most mischievous grin. She knows where she's allowed to be in the house and where she isn't allowed to be though she typically gives herself away by laughing as she puts it into hyper-drive and crawls towards the forbidden zones. She's also very interested in the electronic gadgets though mostly she wants to chew on them. After removing it from her mouth a million times it soon dawns on us that this has been a game the whole time and we are just her pawns. All in all I'm pretty sure we're in for it over the next few years. This girl clearly has a mind of her own and she isn't afraid to use it and you know what? I'm OK with that.
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| Obligatory cute picture for your enjoyment. |
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