This Is Probably TMI

I figured maybe it was time to post a little something about myself.  I tend to be a vain creature (Hi, Jeffrey!) and I like to make sure everybody doesn't forget me.  Me, me, me.  It was me, after all, who carried and gave birth to the two babies we constantly talk about.  I mean, isn't it time we give that a break?  They're all of 2 and 8 months respectively and don't have nearly the same level of awesomeness that I do.

But, in all seriousness, I would like to write a little something about myself.  Specifically, my body post two babies.  This is where most of you can stop reading if you'd like.

First I'd like to mention the fact that after giving birth I felt pretty darn good about my body (both times).  I mean, I'm no Victoria's Secret model bouncing back after a few weeks but I didn't have any stretch marks and my belly went down pretty well (though, as we'll find out later, not as well as I thought).  I held on to some extra weight from Alex that I couldn't shake before getting pregnant with Jo but I've since lost all of that weight and was feeling pretty good about myself.

That was, until a few weeks ago when the pastor of our church asked me if I was pregnant.  I was shocked.  I thought he was telling me a joke.  When the punchline never came, I loudly exclaimed "No!," punched him in the gut, then ran away.  Most of that last sentence is true.

It was at that exact moment that I decided to pick-up my running routine that I had been putting off for long enough.  I did and two weeks into it I'm already injured.  I guess working my way up to 4 miles in less than 2 weeks was kind of stupid.  There goes my beach bod but I don't really care.  I've seen the state of some of the women out there wearing bikini's and I'm going to go for it anyway.  Eh, on second thought maybe not.  I just looked for a bathing suit at Victoria's Secret and I think I'm going to fast for the next two months before going out in a bathing suit.

In the end though, my only real complaint is with my breasts.  They are out of control after breast feeding two babies.  I put on a sports bra and one nipple points one way, the other points another.  This is even after trying to line them up.  It's like they're made of those stress balls filled with sand but way less firm and more of a Jello filling so, actually, not much like a stress ball at all.  I can't even hang out around the house without a bra.  Scratch that.  I can and I do.  But I'm pretty sure I make people uncomfortable with how low my breasts hang, one nipple pointing to the left and the other pointing down.  Why they point that way I have no idea, but it's true.


So, there you have it.  My post two babies, body issues.  It could be worse.  For example, it could be worse if I still weighed 180 pounds (no joke, that's how much I weighed with Jo...it was more than Marcus) but without the added benefit of having a baby inside me, so there's that.  But it could be better.  For example, it could be better if I still had the cute runner's butt I used to have as opposed to the mom butt that's been quietly forming back there.