My Friends Just Call Me "Crazy"

So, remember that time I said, and I quote, "The fact of the matter is while another child is definitely in the future for us I need to become one of the women I despise in order to go through it again. With that being said does anyone have any suggestions on how I can drive myself bat-shit crazy because that’s the only way this is happening" in regards to being pregnant for a second time?  Well, uh, hi.  Nice to meet you.  I'm Bat-Shit Crazy.

How, you ask, did this happen? Other than the more conventional way, my guess is the following, all of which took place at the end of December/beginning of January in what can only be described as a comedy of errors:

1. At the end of December I bought a pair of really nice jeans that I knew wouldn't fit but could act as a goal to work towards because I was still carrying about 8 pounds of pregnancy weight.  (Kuddos to a few friends of Marcus's who asked if I was back to my pre-Alex weight.  That was very thoughtful.  It must have been my pregnancy glow.)
2. Shortly after I bought the aforementioned jeans I took a HPT which came back positive. After digesting the news I realized I would be pregnant for my sister's June wedding so I hurriedly (read: totally jumped the gun) purchased a maternity dress for the occasion. Soon after getting the positive results on the HPT it turned out to be a false-positive (more on that later), so I sent the dress back only to find myself pregnant (for real) a month later.  Did you follow all of that?  I then went back to re-purchase the dress and discovered it was no longer available thus I had to start the search for a maternity dress for a wedding all over again. (In the end it worked out for the best because the new dress is gorgeous.)
3. Also, after realizing I wasn't pregnant I decided to pick-up running again because damnit, those jeans were super cute plus I wanted to lose the last few pounds before even thinking of getting pregnant again. Ha!
4. I then paid a $65 registration fee to sign-up for my first race in over a year as the motivation needed to continue running.
5. Finally, during the mid-January time-frame, right before I knew I was pregnant, I reconnected with my ballet instructor from years ago and promised that I would come back to class in March. In between the time I saw her and the time classes started I discovered I was pregnant but the last thing I wanted to do was go back on my word (because that's what she would have expected after all of these years) so I found myself in class for the first time in 15 years during one of the worst few weeks of the first trimester, twirling and leaping and fighting back nausea all at the same time.

And that's it.  My 5, fool-proof ways for ensuring you will get pregnant.  We'll call it the "Tepaske Method."  Also, I suppose I should look into changing the title of my blog.  But "You and Me Equals Three Plus One" doesn't have as nice a ring to it.

*This post will be a good test to see who actually reads this blog.